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Meg's VBA2C

9/10/2014

10 Comments

 
My husband and I have two children born via c-section. Our eldest daughter was born via c-section because our doctor told us I failed to progress after only 3 hours of being in labor after my water was broken. We were 23 years old, on our own in a city we didn't know, and enrolled in graduate school, and didn't know much about labor and so we trusted her. We found out later that the real reason she pushed for a c-section was because she wanted to go home to her children.  She told us this while I was on the operating table. 

Our beautiful baby girl was born at 9lbs with a head full of hair. She was beautiful. Unfortunately, because of the numbing medication and the exhaustion of it all I was in and out of consciousness and shaking badly. I held her for a few minutes before she and my husband were taken to a different part of the hospital for her check up. I was taken to get an x-ray and then brought into my recovery room and all I remember saying is "Where is my daughter? Where is my husband? I want to hold my baby." 

They didn't bring her to me until after she was already bathed, I lost track of time and it felt like forever before I got to hold my daughter; my husband tells me it was at least an hour and a half. We were over the moon in love with her and happy she came safely. My recovery went very well, up and walking, very little pain (I have a high pain tolerance) and we were sent home three days later. It wasn't until a few months after her birth that the way she came into the world bothered me. I felt like I was lied to, that I wasn't given enough options. Sure, I was happy that we had a healthy baby girl but I felt like something was missing.

Our daughter was only 6 months old before we found out we were expecting number 2. We played with the idea of having a trial of labor with him but nothing really came together. I called two doctors in my area that were VBAC friendly and one was booked, not taking any new clients, and the other one agreed to meet with me. When we met I had a list of questions but as soon as he saw the list and I asked my first one, he seemed annoyed. He bulldozed over the entire conversation, ending it with "If I even think your baby will be over 8 pounds, you'll have a c-section." I left that meeting and cried to my husband over the phone in my car. An ugly cry. I felt defeated. 

We knew that our second baby was going to be at least 9 pounds like our first, and I did not want to have a c-section in the hospital in which this doctor delivered. So we gave up and decided to go with a provider who was very pro-VBAC but unfortunately his practice was not, so he could only offer us a c-section. We took that and delivered a 9 pound 6 ounce baby boy. This was the hardest birth for me. I wasn't able to hold my son for 9 hours due to continuous vomitting from the spinal tap I had. All I could do was stare at him while my husband held him, skin to skin. When I was finally able to hold him, I was happy that he was healthy but so sad and empty inside for the way he came into the world.

When we decided to have our third baby we knew we were at a fork in the road. We knew that a VBA2C was our only shot if we wanted to have more children after this third baby. 

This time I didn't even bother calling the previous doctor who told me he wouldn't allow me to give birth if he suspected a big baby. I called two other doctors, one was booked and one told me on the phone "You're a medical risk." Great. I called my husband again, crying. After our conversation I decided to think outside of the box and called a midwifery group in a city an hour and a half away from me. I talked to them and they seemed more than optimistic that we could have our third child vaginally. I felt like I won the lottery.

I staid with my OB until I was 20 weeks and then transferred my care an hour and a half away from me, where my mom lives. The 21 weeks of travel, sometimes by myself, sometimes with my kids, was never a burden to me. I was focused on having this baby under my own terms. I zeroed in on what I wanted, using the nights to commit myself to positive thinking. I can't say we had any non supporters in our lives. But our friends and family just thought we were crazy for driving that far to deliver a baby and unsure about why we would take the risks that come with vaginal births after c-sections. But we were confident in our choice, we knew that it was our destiny.

I went to the doctor on a Wednesday, 7 days overdue and nothing was happening. They gave me the option of a c-section, waiting it out until I was 2 weeks overdue and then inducing, or inducing on Friday at 9 days overdue. I told them that a c-section was completely out of the question, we didn't come this far just to give up. They were very nice about it though, the practice believes in giving every option and I appreciated that. We decided that we would go with an induction on Friday.

Thursday morning I woke up with horrible contractions. From nothing happening to contractions the next day!? I was over the moon. We spent our time cleaning up the house, packing the rest of our things, getting the oldest two ready and when we felt like our home was in order, we started on our hour and a half drive. 

We made it to my moms, dropped the kids off, and went to the hospital. They told me that I was barely at 1 but I was happy with that. We walked around the hospital, me contracting in hidden stairways, my husband right by my side. I was checked again but nothing changed and I was instructed to go home and relax. I went back to my moms and ate friend fish and french fries. I was so hungry! I was never allowed to eat in the hospital before. But I was eating! And hugging my babies! And leaning on my mother for support. I went to sleep for a while until I was up with more contractions. This time they were closer together and we decided to go back into the hospital.

At the hospital they told me I was barely at 2 but because it was getting late and I was set for an induction the next morning, I could stay. We settled into the hospital and I immediately fell in love with my nurse. She was amazing and the entire staff were pro-VBAC.

That night I slept pretty well and woke up on Friday with stronger but irregular contractions. Throughout the day I was allowed to move around as much as I wanted, including getting in a shower, so long as my portable monitoring system was picking up the baby's vitals. The baby was doing great, I was great (but in pain) and everything was moving along. I was checked at this time I was at 3! The doctor said "I'm sorry. You're only at 3" and I said "Why are you sorry!? I'm doing this on my own!!!!" I was so happy. The first OB we ever had, our first c-section, told me my body had failed me...I was devastated then. But now, my body was doing exactly what it was supposed to be doing.

I was told that I would need pitocin. There is a lot of literature out there saying that pitocin could cause rupture but I trusted my care providers and I had done my own research and I knew that at very small and controlled doses it can be fine. I agreed to that and contracted with pitocin until my body was able to contract regularly on its own. During my contractions I shut my eyes and I reminded myself things like "This is opening you up." "This is natural." "This is supposed to happen. "Just relax."- No it didn't take all the pain away, but it helped.

Around 4 in the morning, on Saturday, I told my husband "I'm feeling shaky..I have to throw up!" He asked if it was normal..I said..I think so..But he went to get the nurse staff anyway. Just in time too because I threw up in a bucket! I didn't even think at the time that throwing up could be a sign of transition into labor, I just knew I had to throw up. The nurse checked me and the midwife yelled "Yes! It's time! Hold on! We have to go tell everyone, they didn't think this was going to happen! We have to do a happy dance."

And they really did..They left the room, screamed in the hall "She's ready!" and danced!  I looked at my husband and I was in disbelief. 

My body had done this all on its own, my body wasn't a failure.

I began pushing our baby out with the help of an amazing team. The midwife placed warm cloths on me before every push and talked me through everything. My husband was fanning me and that wonderful nurse? Well she was coaching me on how to breathe. It was all very exciting and my breathing was erratic and she helped me with that. I remember saying "You guys are telling me to push, when I'm not at the peek of my contraction." and they apologized! They said they were sorry and I should just push when I wanted to! 

I finally got the head out and I stopped contracting..I guess my body thought I was done. The doctor sounded very worried and told me "Push please..Just push." and I did..But nothing happened. My eyes were closed the entire time but my husband says one of the nurses pressed a red button and more nurses came in. 

My midwife said in a very stern soft voice "You have to get this baby out..NOW" and I did. I pushed hard once or twice and there was a popping noise and out came my baby. What happened was that her shoulders almost got stuck.

I opened my eyes and looked at my husband. He was crying! And all I kept saying was "I did it! I fucking did it!" And I was crying. There isn't a word for the way I was feeling. 

We had a baby girl. But she wasn't crying. I remember saying "Why isn't she crying!" And a different nurse came by my side and said "She is fine. She is perfect..She's just in shock." And right when the nurse said that, she belted out the loudest cry. 

Our daughter was crying, I was crying, my husband was crying and the medical staff was in awe. 

The staff weighed her quickly and took measurements and then handed her to me. I had never nursed our first two, life circumstances didn't allow for it. But with her, we were determined to make breastfeeding work. I was nursing her, marveling at her beautiful face and then heard "She is 21 inches long..and..10 and a half pounds!" 

I looked up at them and said "Stop lying..You need to weigh her again. I don't believe you." After she was done nursing, they weighed her again. 10 and a half pounds.

This 2 time c-section "medical risk" mom birthed a 10 and a half pound baby! I wanted to climb the tallest mountain and shout "Fuck all of you!" 

I used to cry whenever I talked about the birth of my oldest children. I felt empty and like something was stolen from me. But now I feel like I have healed. 

Women are allowed to have healthy babies AND healthy birth experiences. They are not mutually exclusive. 

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10 Comments

Stacey's VBAC & Home VBAC

2/28/2014

1 Comment

 
Stacey's VBAC

"He's never coming."  I had convinced myself of this.  You see, I KNEW Madison was coming early...and she was 5 days past the EDD, so I was SURE Kyle was coming mid or late September.  He was due September 10, so I was expecting him around the 20th.

When I woke up with slightly painful contractions, I was in denial.  I rolled over and looked at the clock, 3AM.  "This isn't it."  I rolled back over and tried to go back to sleep, but there was another contraction, 3:05.  "This is so annoying!  I just want to sleep.  I know this isn't it, so please stop practicing!"  3:10, a third contraction.  "Ok, I'll go get some water...and my ball just in case."  As I came back upstairs I thought, "Well, this could be it, but I don't want to get my hopes up.  He isn't due until Saturday."  After about 30 minutes (~6 contractions), I decided to wake DH.  He had been sleeping in the guestroom because his snoring was keeping me awake.

"Honey, wake up.  I think it is time."  "Huh? Ok," rolls over and back to sleep.  "Wake up!  It is time." "Ok.  I'll get it," clearly still sleeping.   "HELLO!  I'M IN LABOR!  GET UP!!!" "What?  Ok, let's go to the hospital!"  He was finally awake.  We looked at our sheet to see when to call Dr. T..."It says to call when contractions are 6-8 minutes apart."  We called and Tia informed us that Dr. T was already at the hospital.  "How far apart are the contractions?" "5 minutes.  Been that way for almost an hour."  "Go to the hospital."  We called Annette (doula) and asked her to meet us at the hospital.  Then we called our neighbor to come stay at our house with our daughter.  "She can have cereal for breakfast.  And here is her cup, milk first then juice or water.  She can eat a lunchable and some fruit for lunch.  Her clothes are on my bed.  She..." "Relax, momma.  You get to the hospital and have that baby.  I'll take care of everything here."  We packed up the car and were on our way.

Upon arrival, the hospital doors were...locked!  Luckily, a guard was walking by and let us in.  DH went to park the car and the guard wheeled me upstairs.  Check in was smooth.  DH arrived shortly after I checked in and they took me to my room where the questions began.  Just as the nurse was finishing, Annette arrived.  Thank goodness she was there!  I had forgotten my birth plan at home  but Annette saved the day!

Dr. T came around 5AM to check me.  "She's still smiling...She's 6 cm.  Looks like you're staying."  Thank goodness!  I would have died if I got sent home!  I needed to stand, that felt better.  I hugged my husband's neck and we swayed.  Ok, that doesn't feel good anymore.  All fours?  I need ice.  It's hot.  I need to stand up.  Ugh, nothing will dull this pain!  "Relax your shoulders."  Thanks for the reminder, Annette.  Breathe, Stace.  You can do this.  I squatted and OMG!  That hurts!  "It will help open things up."  I know, Annette, but...breathe, Stace.  You can do this.  I had to, so on the next contraction, I squatted.  "That a girl!"  I've never been more encouraged!  Thanks again, Annette!  "I need to be checked."  

Dr. Tate returned to check me again, 8:15 and I was 8.5cm.  At this point, contractions were rough, but still bearable.  No request for pain relief.  I was ready to have this baby.  "Do you want me to break your water?"  "But that means more pain...ok, go ahead.  If there is ANY chance that will speed things up."  He broke my water.  The next time he came back, they got the "tools".

Around 10AM, Dr. T checked me and said I was 9cm, almost 10 and that we would push through to 10.  I had an anterior lip that he had to get around the baby's head.  It was time to push.   "Every time you have a contraction, I want you to take a deep breath and hold it.  Push for 10 counts.  We want to get 3 pushes for every contraction."  I got the instructions, but it didn't sink in at first.  As a contraction came, he instructed my husband to hold up my right leg and Annette to hold my left.  Deep breath.  "1, 2, 3..."  Wooooo.  "No, I said hold it for 10 counts.  You're letting it out."  Deep breath.  "1, 2, 3, 4, 5..."  Wooooo.  "You gotta hold it.  You aren't holding it."  Deep breath. "1, 2, 3...."  I got breathing down.  Now to push properly.     Who knew it required so much thinking?

"When you push, I want you to bear down like you are having a bowel movement.  Get those legs up."  "This hurts."  PUSH!  "Nope, you aren't pushing right."  "I don't know how."  "You can do this."  "I'm tired."  "Why do you think they call this labor?  I see.  She doesn't believe she can do this."  Great job, Dr. Tate.  "I can, just not right now."  PUSH!  I was so tired.  "Alright, here we go, she's having another contraction."  My ever so concerned DH says, "Babe, are you having a contraction?"  "No."  As Dr. T. feels my stomach, "She's lying."  Wooooo.  "I'm tired, I just need to take a break during that one."  "Every one you do that through is a wasted contraction."  I love Dr. Tate's straightforwardness (if that is word).  This had to be the longest 30 minutes of my life!  PUSH!  "I made a mistake, I need drugs."  "Too late for that.  You gotta push this baby out."  "No I don't, I have options.  What if I was unconscious.  DH, hit me!"  Ok, I need help.  "Get the forceps and pull him out."  "I won't pull him out, I will guide him."  "Whatever, get this kid out of me!"  Once they were on, it took one good contraction and 4 pushes.  

I felt everything!  What a different experience it was?  I felt his head come out and the tear .  I thought that would hurt the most and I felt it, but it wasn't painful at all.  I felt his head come out on the 3rd push of a contraction and everyone was ready to wait for another one.  I couldn't wait, I took a breath and pushed...Kyle was here!  They picked him up and put him on my stomach.  "Roll him over so his stomach is facing this way and DH can cut the cord."  I did it!  I did it!  I couldn't believe it, I did it!  DH was crying and just kept saying, "You are amazing!"  Kyle was officially born and 10:31AM on September 8, 2011.

While they weighed him, I got worked on.   They were stitching up my tear. "Are the almost finished?"  "Not quite, honey."  Annette was familiar with this process and she knew it would take awhile.  "I just want to close my legs."  I totally understood the skit I had recently seen in "Be Bold".  It felt like it was taking years and all I wanted to do was close my legs.  Finally, they were finished and handed him back and I began nursing.  He was a pro and latched right on, no issues.  Words cannot express the way I felt/feel...I'm still in disbelief and he is 6 weeks old.


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Stacey's HBAC

Nov. 9, 2013


I woke up at 6:30am on Nov. 9 and I felt refreshed. For the first time in weeks, I had pretty much slept the entire night, only waking two or three times to roll over. I had to use the restroom, but was hesitant. Going to the bathroom would start my morning contractions and I just wanted to continue relaxing. Nevertheless, I went, but no contractions. I laid in bed thinking abt the day. We planned to go to the zoo to encourage the baby to come. At 730, Maddie came in and I put on cartoons for her while I went to the bathroom again.


With this bathroom break, I had some concerning stool. My contractions also started around this time. Slightly more painful than yesterday, but I wasn't sure. I had about 3 from the toilet, to washing hands, and back to my room. These hurt! By 8, I had gone to the restroom again and decided I should be timing the contractions. I sent my midwife and doula a text. "We may have a baby today."  Both of them responded with "what is going on?" "contractions abt 5 min apart lasting a min and 15 sec" My cell rings, it is my midwife, but I'm having a contraction. I call her back and she says she is on her way. Then my doula calls. She too thinks she needs to head our way. I try to relax. Nate was feeding the kids breakfast and I was on my ball watching the contractions.

By the time Lisa arrived, I had moved downstairs. Nate called my cousin to come watch the kids and they were finishing breakfast. I was so glad to see Lisa. I didn't have to do it alone anymore! She started my bath for me and said that should help. Nate put the kids in the basement to play and things got going...

At this point, contractions were a 1.5 min apart and a little over a min long. I got in the tub and immediately felt better, but nothing slowed down. Nate was back and forth from the kids and I was feeling pushy. "Lisa, get Nate. And call B(midwife). Where is she? I don't want to have the baby without her."  Another contraction, and I'm really scared. I can't stop my body from pushing. I pooped again.  I wanted to feel for the baby's head but I was terrified to find out he was crowning so I didn't.  Lisa was awesome and emptied the tub and got new water going.

10:00-in walks my midwife. Thank God! Nate gets in the tub and sits on the back ledge.  I put my arms over his legs and got in a squat position. B reached down and put pressure on my perineum. I thought she was going to check me, but after so many deliveries, she knew I was complete. 



Another contraction and you could see my belly take on a new form, push! My bag of waters poked out still in tact. Another big push and there was his head. "The head is out, baby girl. Come on let's meet the baby. Wait, the cord. OK, I got it off." I push again...nothing. "big push! Bigger!" I push again...nothing. I can feel his head and everything in me wants the rest out but it seems my efforts are in vain. 

"Get her up!" Nate lifts me by my arms so that I am in a more upright position. I feel a contraction and some weird and uncomfortable movement. "Don't do that." "It isn't me, it is the baby." I push again and this time B has her hand up to help. The baby is stuck. I'm pushing, she is pulling...one more contraction and he is here! He is also huge! I'm sitting in the tub, holding my baby. He takes a few seconds to cry but he is OK. Then we hear, "I think his arm might be broken." I'm on such a high, I just keep talking to the baby. Nate is worried, but we both relish in what just happened.  Nate pulls back his leg, we have a boy! I ask Lisa to go get the kids from the basement.

When they arrive, they both seem in shock. "Is that your blood? Look, its a new baby!" Madison had watched several videos so she was kind of familiar.  Kyle points and says "bebe".  As I'm sitting in the tub waiting on the placenta, MB(midwife’s assistant) walks in and shortly after that, my cousin Mary walks in. "We have a baby!" "What? Already!?!?" We called my mom to give her the news. Nicholas was born on her birthday.

Once the placenta came and we were out of the tub, we moved to the bed to cut the cord. It, like everything else, was large. We had to wait bc the supplies were still being sterilized. It all just happened so fast! Once they were ready, B got Nate and clamped the cord. He cut it and she gave us a lesson. "Here are the three vessels. Oxygen in, food in, and waste out."  She gets out her scale to weigh him. Everyone puts in bids. "9lbs" "8# 12oz" "10# 2oz".  B was right on! He was 10lbs, 2 oz.  We wrap him up and everyone is cleaning up as we sit and love our new baby. I noticed some blood and called B. The cord was so thick, the initial clamp had cut through. She got another band and put it on and everything was fine. His arm was also moving OK, so we figured it was fine as well.

What an amazing team. B checked out my baby and they all kept commenting on how awesome things had gone. I was in disbelief. We did it! B checked me for a tear. "There is a small one, but I don't think you need stitches." So I sat back and tried to start nursing.  He gave me a little trouble nursing, but he got it eventually.


We ended up calling my chiropractor to come look at him and he got his first adjustment. She also suggested we go get x-rays. It was a Saturday evening, so we scheduled a visit with the family doctor and then for the earliest xray appt we could get.  We found out Tuesday that Nicholas does have a broken arm.  Not exactly how I would have liked things, but after doing some research, I’m glad my midwife knew what to do and how to act appropriately in an emergency.  His arm will heal in a few weeks and he is handling it like a champ.  Overall, I’m glad we did it and I am so in love with my new little man!
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1 Comment

TéMyra's Home VBAC

12/17/2013

2 Comments

 
Last year I was so excited to find out my fiancé (now hubby) and I were pregnant. I love birth and aspire to be a midwife. I got my hands all on the "hippie" Ina May stuff I could get a hold of.  I just knew I was going to birth this amazing little girl all naturally and it would be just perfect--until at 24 weeks I woke up to a stabbing pain in my left side and just knew everything wasn't good.  My mom took me to hospital and baby looked fine but my cervix was only 11mm and was close to letting my membranes bulge.  Of course everyone freaked, I was ordered to bedrest and to go to a MFM over an hour away from me to ensure this baby stayed put.  They put me on progesterone suppositories and I was terrified.  Birth wasn't supposed to be like this.  All those wonderful stories lied.  Well lo and behold my daughter didn't come early but actually came late.  41 weeks I let my doctors start to freak me out saying I was post term, this was no good and we'll just induce.  So I agreed and at 41 weeks 3 days I went in.  After 16 hours of labor I stopped at 7cm was exhausted and worried.  So the one person I put all my trust and faith in--my midwife--said the "c" word. This warm beautiful birth angel knew my desire for all natural.  I had made it this far without any pain meds and just caved.  When my angel said c-section I just said ok. I had a beautiful 9lb 5oz daughter May 14th.  We were doing great until she was whisked away and I was told I wasn't to see for an hour until I recovered.  My world shattered--my bunny wasn't mine to hold. I had a rough recovery, I was stitched up double layer, because through my haze I remember Ina May Gaskin's words to make sure I got doubled, but recovery was horrible.  I had incontinence for three days due to being catheterized. I was beyond exhausted and drained.  I did breastfeed but was so hurt I didn't enjoy it, until much later. I just knew I could never do this again...this wasn't me, this wasn't birth and this wasn't what I wanted.

Well, when I found out I was pregnant when my daughter was 8 months old, I was excited yet hestitant. I just turned twenty and was going to be a mom twice over and knew my uterus would just be on cusp of VBAC "ok" rules.  But I learned my lesson, no more just blindly trusting doctors without real research and proof. No more being compliant. And to put my faith in Jehovah God instead of man.  I'm my baby's sole guardian and protector, I must be woman and stand up.  I was excited for first prenatal and was armed with info and so excited to bring another gift in the world.  Well I was devasted to hear flat out "This hospital doesn 't do VBACs, you want one go somewhere else."  End of discussion.  I was hurt and disappointed.  I found out just how sad my little state was when it came to birth.  Nobody touched them and our c-section rate is 35%.  But I still studied, looked for support online and through mutual friends, and most importantly prayed to Jehovah God about what I should do. I insisted VBAC is what we want and VBAC is what we're gonna get.  I stuck with my local midwives and doctor practice.  When they saw how determined I was I got support, was clearly told the hospital's policy of no VBACs but was also encouraged for being smart. 

I planned on a UC and had tried to hire a doula, but birth is so misunderstood in my state and women are literally fighting for homebirth and normal birth everyone was too scared to actually take part, for fear of being arrested and accused of practicing medicine without a license.  But I did talk to some wonderful ladies and one doula was amazing for answering all my questions and really preparing me if I did decide to have a unattended birth.  I was on the fence of UC or laboring at home as long possible then transfer. 

Well at 38 weeks outward pressure and my nerves built and I didn't know if I could really do it.  I saw a very rough OB who was irritated that I waited so long to schedule and demanded I schedule a cesarean.  I broke down, scheduled it and cried to the woman how I was disappointed and hurt.  They scheduled it for the following week due to my request (which they found shocking a woman would wait so long).  But then I had a miraculous midwife who told me to basically believe in myself, that I have power to cancel my section, they can't force me in to one.  And if I did show up pushing and ready to go they couldn't force me.  That gave me the extra courage and strength I needed to cancel my RCS for the next day.  That weekend I lost my mucus plug, had bloody show and was hopeful my baby would be in my arms very soon. Nonetheless, I found myself disappointed and frustrated.  My cousin and aunt who were due a few days apart had their babies already and everyone was worried what was wrong with me.  I was 40 weeks and avoided the office, I knew we were healthy and ok.  Family & well meaning friends became so overly zealous I shut the world out and tuned in to support VBAC and natural birth communities, then most importantly my self. 

I found myself bitting my nails watching weeks tick by, reassuring myself & others 40, then 41 and finally 42 weeks was still ok.  I had prodromal labor whole time and felt flustered.  On Monday (going on Tuesday) night, I had contractions that felt real and became excited and went to hospital--I was so ready for this to be it!!  Midwife on duty was very snappy and pissed I was 42 weeks, had no Rh shot and no c-section.  I said if I'm 10cm and ready to go let me push.  But i was only 2-3 and 80% effaced (I had been there since 37 weeks).  They wanted me to have c-section or leave AMA.  My husband talked me through it and we agreed AMA.  So we left, made arrangements for oldest & traveled 1hr and 1/2 to a teaching hospital to have VBAC hope.  When we arrived I was only 4cm and 90% with contractions 10minute apart but not doing anything.  The OB said she wouldn't allow me to VBAC and my chances were only 20%.  I could have had c-section that day and finally have my bun.  I refused it and said I only would agree if a biophysical profile showed baby was in danger. Well he scored 8 out of 8 and we still kept didn't know what sex our baby was. We once again agreed to AMA and go home after resting at his parents nearby. 

Finally that friday at 8am, my water broke in a huge gush while we were in bed. I leaked for a day and had no real contractions.  But I spent that night at my mom's because I knew my toddler was bringing me out of labor land and it helped.  Saturday afternoon I felt rushes occasionally and my hubby brought over our daughter so he could really clean house before baby arrived.  My sweet daughter rubbed my thighs while I labored a bit on the toilet.  Finally around 10pm that night rushes seemed to pick up and get serious.  At 10:40, I must have hit second stage--I labored in shower/tub and moooed to keep my bottom open.  Hubby kept asking if it was time to go to hospital but I knew we past that point I was finally feeling primal like everyone told me I would.  It was horribly painful, I couldn't get comfortable and just wanted it to end.  I mentally was cussing out those ladies on orgasmic birth for lying, this stuff was far from orgasmic.  But then right when I thought I couldn't handle it, I said I want an epidural and only way I can get one is to let my hormones flow.  And at that instance my birth switched. 

I put heating pad on my back, turned on kingdom melodies, prayed and leaned over my bed while pulling on sheets during rushes.  And it was so intense and beautiful, I finally hit my sweet spot.  I then got on the bed and laid on my left side, and felt my body start pushing.  I naturally just curled inward around a pillow and held on to pack n play beside my bed.  It was so intense, and was so much pressure but it felt amazing.  It was like making love and you get so caught up in moment...it can be rough but it still feels just so amazing you don't care.  It was like that but so much better, I could feel hormones rolling through my blood and bringing me this incredible pleasure.  I just automatically held my right leg in the air and my body went to work and guided my baby out.  I felt warm and hazy and I just felt an inner voice not really tell me, but let me know, it's time to squat.  So I got off the bed, hovered over my chux pads and felt below.  I could feel how warm, buttery and slippery I was.  I asked hubby to grab mirror and said he's coming.  He was so drunk with sleep he thought I was just saying it until he saw head and then rushed into action.  I giggled to myself and just couldn't believe how good this felt and that it was happening.  My well meaning hubby tried to get under me and catch baby but he just threw me off, and we retracted then with two pushes shoulder and body slide out on the floor.  I felt the tear but it was absent minded and didn't hurt I just felt the fast skin stretch.  I was so impatient and didn't care.  I then moved baby forward and swung my leg over its body and leaned back.  I brought it to my chest, smiled, kissed and just rambled on welcomes, high sweeet baby, hello Jax and what not.  My awesome husband sat beside me and said I love you Jax.  And I slipped back into the real world.  I said "oh check and make sure he's a boy, were calling him Jax and don't even know his sex."  Well I saw a penis and my mind confirmed what my heart already knew.  I quickly asked for a towel to warm and rub his back.  He only cried once then settled on my chest and sucked his hand.  I then asked to get pictures. Then finally realized I didn't know what time he was born. My father in law shouted out 1:11 when he heard first cry.  I thanked him and just soaked in our gift.  Then I started shaking and saw huge blood clot thing.  I took placenta ease then told hubby call ambulance to check us out.  Ambulance came and I realized I was shaking from hormones and pure excitement.  We woke up my mom to give me a robe from her house so I can be dressed when they transported us.  She was shocked I had him home alone and was a little dazed and confused.  Daddy then cut the cord and we wrapped up and transported. I was fine and found out my buddy was 9lb 10oz and 21in long with 13cm head.  And the rest is history.

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Lois's Home VBAC

9/24/2013

3 Comments

 
My first pregnancy was perfect. I received my prenatal care at a birthing center, loved the midwives and was 100% sure I would have an unmedicated vaginal birth..... I went into labour three days past my EDD (estimated due date). To make a long story short, I was in a ton of pain and felt like labor was not progressing. So after many hours of labour, and at the suggestion of my midwives, I transferred to the hospital.  I got an epidural and then I was fully dilated and ready to push; however, a doctor happened to walk in to the room and did not like the baby's heart rate so he, not my midwives, decided I needed an emergency c-section and that was it. 
I hated everything about having a c-section and when I asked for answers at the birthing center,  my midwife said "Oh, the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck."

I was pregnant with my second a little over a year later.  I knew I wanted a VBAC and returned to the birthing center, but was plagued by doubts and annoyed by the midwives' defensiveness when I tried to talk more about why my first pregnancy ended in a c-section. I got tired of this and switched to a homebirth midwife at 24 weeks!

This pregnancy was way different (harder) than my first. I had acute SPD (symphysis pubis dysfunction, a painful pelvis disorder) and I was caring for a very active 2 year old toddler. I felt heavy and uncomfortable but excited to meet the new baby. I did everything possible to get myself in the best birthing shape: walking at least a mile everyday with my little one, 5 visits tho the chiropractor and taking Borage oil, Arnica, prenatal supplements and pregnancy tea as advised by my midwife--raspberry leaf, stinging nettle, chamomile, elderberry and anise (added the anise only for the last 4 weeks).

I went into labour 5 days past my EDD at 11:20 PM and felt bad because I kept waking up my husband, so I stayed on the couch until he woke up in the morning at 6 AM. Contractions were about 8 minutes apart. My husband called the midwife and let her know what was going on. Labored for the whole day before I called my midwife again to tell her the contractions were getting closer together, at about 5 minutes apart. By the time she got to my house, I was in a ton of pain and begging for relief. Not to mention every time I tried to eat anything, I threw  it up 5 minutes later.  When I was examined, I was 5 cm and completely thinned out. I was not happy--I had been in labor for almost two days!  I still couldn't keep anything down, so I felt weak. I started thinking about going to the hospital, but my midwife, doula and husband all reminded me why I was having a home birth and I decided to keep laboring at home at least until the next day even though I was begging for it to be over. My midwife checked me in the morning and I was fully dilated!  That really encoraged me mentally even though the baby was still high up. 
 
 One of my biggest fears was that the baby would never descend, and it felt like he wasn't because after an hour of pushing, I could still feel him way up in my ribs. My midwife checked his heartbeat and  it was right below my c-section scar.  He was getting lower!  I was amazed and motivated.  Soon after, I felt my body pushing.  It was so raw and guttural!!!

I felt the same "baby not descending"  during my first labor about the baby not descending and my midwives said  " Well we can always go to the hospital  to check."  I can't believe they could've checked with their fingers or a Doppler ! 

After about an hour and a half of pushing, my water broke--more like exploded--all over my husband.

Baby O was born about two hours later ! 

It was so amazing to put him on my chest cord still attached and I just stared  in awe.  We stayed like that for over an hour and then my midwife cleaned and weighed him.  10 lbs 8 ounces!! We were shocked, we thought he would be big but not that big!  

I had no tears or anything probably  thanks to the  borage oil and arnica!

I am so grateful for the VBAC online community.  I've gained so much knowledge that led me to this fantastic ending. 

My midwife was amazing, I begged her for drugs,  to take me to the hospital,  to smother me with a pillow,  accidentally kicked her in the head while pushing and kept saying "you don't understand how I'm feeling, have some pity."  She let me be me sometimes and other times just coached me perfectly through a contraction, or during pushing.  I'm so happy I found her. I feel eternally grateful to her.

Things I did during pregnancy:


Saw an amazing midwife
Walked a mile or more almost everyday
Watched and read successful Vbac stories
Took arnica and borage oil 
Had a few webster chiropractic and one acupuncture session
Ate decently 

What helped during labor:
My midwife reminding me to breathe(blow that baby down) during contractions and not scream
Tens machine helped with pain before 5 CM 
Counter pressure on my lower back with a hot rice sock was the only relief after 5CM, even during pushing
My husband probably spent 34 of my 36 hour labour doing counter pressure he was the best birth partner possible 
My doula massaged, talked calmly to me and even helped with my toddler.
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